Daisy of Love : Of Lateness and Skunks

Sorry this latest swipe at Daisy of Love is coming in a late, but I celebrated my birthday! YAY! And Daisy took a week off! So I took another week off! And now I’m totally for real late! To make up for this I talked about the show on Episode 48 of the podcast. Now I may be getting older, but it’s nice to know that Daisy has never done that and is sleeping with stuffed animals and making a house full of degenerates compete for her love. Despite my age you have proven to me Daisy that we’re so much alike! It is true! When can we party together?

Maybe we’re not ready to party just yet, considering your still suffering from a broken heart due to London. Damn Daisy, and it’s bringing down all the other boys too. Hell, Cage is all crazy-go-nuts and waking up Chi Chi from his little nap by repeatedly ramming Chi Chi’s bed, that’s just how upset he is. Daisy, what are you doing to these boys?

Now Big Rig, Big Rig is pretty awesome. He makes some coffee and puts some Fig Newtons on a plate to bring to Daisy in the morning. Why Fig Newtons? Big Rig explains because it is “Daisy’s favorite cookie.” Woah, woah, woah! A Fig Newton is NOT a cookie! Sorry Nabisco, years of advertising revenue undone by a reality show contestant. None of that matters when you see the smile that it puts Daisy’s face. Awwww, see there Daisy, someone besides Riki really does care about you in the house! Speaking of Riki, it is just about time for him to announce this episode’s contest!

The contest this episode is that the boys have to do a photo shoot of Daisy for her new single. The boys are divided into 2 teams. Team 1 is Big Rig, Chi Chi, 12 Pack and Cage. Team 2 is Fox, Sinister, Flex and 6 Gauge. They each need to take jobs on to have a successful photo shoot, stylist, photographer, set dresser and model.

Team 1 is up first and they’re having Daisy dolled up like Marilyn Monroe and pose on the bar with 12 Pack as the model. Big Rig is behind the camera snapping the pictures and is doing a good job. Well, the best job he can do with 12 Pack playing kissy-face with Daisy the whole time. Eventually he just gives up. He can’t watch this and barely can I. Chi Chi is a better man than either of us and picks up the camera and gets right into snapping more pictures.

Team 2 is now up for their shoot. They’ve picked a very messy ‘80s vibe for the cover. It seems like a it is right up Daisy’s alley as far as the tone she wants to express with her sound and her image. So basically it looks like an Avril Lavigne album cover. Getting to capture the photo right was no small task when you have Fox on your team. Between him not wanting to be Daisy’s hair stylist, even though he IS a hair stylist, him crashing the photo shoot as an unwanted model and then trying to have him choose a picture to present featuring himself as much as Daisy. The rest of the team rightly only accepts his reluctant hair styling as his only contribution to the contest.

So who’s the winner? Professional photographer Bree (who’s a guest judge) thinks that Team 1’s Marilyn Monroe vibe is the clear winner. Does Daisy listen to professional advice? Heck no! Daisy didn’t like Team 1’s energy, so Team 2’s faux-punk photo is the winner. On top of that Daisy picks FOX as the team MVP for a special solo date with her. Will the injustices never end?

The date was really icky. It had this whole Greek theme, if the only thing you know about Greek culture is the depiction of toga parties from ‘80s frat comedies. So they’re wearing togas and feeding each other fruit and chocolate and talking about, basically a whole lot of nothing. Daisy is even trying to engage Fox in conversation and there’s a whole lot of nothing coming back out of him. He can’t even give a straight answer to a single question she poses. Fox says he’s feeling a real connection, Daisy feels they only have a physical one, and I feel sick.

After the date the real fun begins, and by fun I mean skunk invasion. That’s right, as the boys are drinking it up out by the pool a skunk sneaks into the house. 12 Pack has a plan to get the skunk, this plan gets him a face full of skunk spray. The smell 12 Packs heaving makes Big Right throw up, which in turn also sets Flex off tossing his cookies as well. In the end Big Rig is the guy that gets the offending animal out of the house, and everyone is thankful. Especially Cage, as for him it lightened the increasing tension and bad moods in the house.

Not much really happens for a while. There’s the date w/ the winning photo team to Skateland. Not a one of them skates. So this was fun for whom? And on the way home from the date 6 Gauge shows off his six gauge penni piercing. Daisy doesn’t look impressed.

Even less impressive, at least for me, the show takes a turn from Daisy of Love to as Daisy herself put it, Daisy of Kill, or as I like to put it Daisy of Cage Is A Damn Thug. So yeah, Cage being a drunken lout manages to burn Flex around campfire. To make up for this he allows Flex a single shot to the face and then remarks that if he doesn’t take it then he is “not a real man! What are you going to do about it?” Flex declines the opportunity and Cage continues to drink more. Chi Chi is getting worried about Cage. “Cage is my boy” he says, and recall how my boys usually shake my bed around as I sleep because they’re upset about a woman. Cage then starts to taunt 6 Gauge into a fight and even lunges at him. Flex tries to hold them apart and the Flex gets Cage in a hold to prevent further Cage idiocy.

Daisy needs to go and talk to Cage about his craziness, basically because the producers told her to. Crybaby Cage is a mess, and even while talking to Daisy he says how he basically just wants to go and beat up Flex. Daisy can’t even talk him into staying and not getting in any more fights. While all this is going on the other boys are patently waiting on the risers in the elimination room to be joined by Daisy and Cage. This just doesn’t happen as Cage leaves the house. Riki goes ahead and dismisses the boys as once again there’s no elimination ceremony.

Remember the episode before this one? Episode 4? It is such a distant memory. Or see Daisy prove how much she hates violence when she has the boys pound the damn out of each other in Episode 6.