Archive for June, 2009
Daisy of Love : I was Only Playing with You Before but Now…
The time has come, once again, for I, Bryan Jose, to recap last week’s “Daisy of Love” so that you, the home reader and viewer, will go into tonight’s episode fully reminded of the events. Something like that. It is not like I’d watch the show, take some notes and then slack off for a week. That’d never happen. Hey look, Riki’s wearing a Supersuckers t-shirt! Thanks for the distraction from my lame intro Riki! And speaking of cool fashion choices on this episode, I have to mention Sinister’s glasses. I find it very odd how very normal he looked in them. They’re big, plastic, clunky glasses, and he’s not the most normal looking guy, but when you put them together he looks like that nice, but slightly weird cousin you always meet at your family reunions hovering around the keg of Natty Lite or the spread of homemade apple pies.
Speaking of food, the challenge this episode is for the boys to cook Daisy a meal. It’ll be a 5 course meal with each of the boys handling a course each. Flex states that he hopes Daisy likes ramen, which is exactly what I was thinking. Actually what I was thinking was that if I was on the show I’d cook some good ass hamburgers while shouting “It’s burger time, you know I’m having fun!” Who would expect these guys to cook anything real on their own? As it turns out no one, the boys get some help from catering cooks as well as get a list of ingredients, said ingredients and cooking directions. Basically a monkey could cook these things, and cook them at least well enough to eat, as long as said monkey was literate. While I’m not sure I could say this at the beginning of the season, I feel relatively positive that these 5 men have no problem working their way around a bunch of words.
On with the cooking! Wait; forget the cooking, other than Big Rig’s admirer and Flex talking about getting a boner nothing interesting happened. So, on with the eating of the cooking! First up with have Big Rig’s slightly runny heart-shaped zucchini quiche. Apparently it was still pretty good and Daisy liked it despite not being about to say the word “quiche”. Next we have Chi Chi’s French onion soup that he cried over. Sure, it was from cutting the onions, but it wasn’t the end of his tears tonight. Next course is Sinister’s lasagna, on top of which Sinister made a noodle skull. Daisy is all “there’s a skull on it,” in her confessional interview “A skull and cross bones, like poison.” No Daisy, you half-wit, not like poison, like the skull that’s on about 80% of your clothing. Do you look at what you wear? Do you even dress yourself? Daisy, Daisy, you’re driving me crazy! Every time you do something smart, like kick off Fox, you do something like this that makes me question your intelligence all over again.
Speaking of questioning things, when Daisy gets served Flex’s Chicken Cordon Bleu and she asks what it is. Seriously producers, this is the second thing you’ve served Daisy that she doesn’t even know anything about. But she likes it, so does everyone else, as well as liking everything that’s been served tonight. See, my monkey statement stands! It all comes down to the dessert, Dave Pack’s red velvet cake. Even though Flex doubts that Dave can pull it off due to his being a professional douche bag, the boy seems to have made a damn fine cake. In your face, Flex! According to Daisy “red velvet cake = orgasm!” So I take it he did well?
Continue Reading Add comment June 28, 2009
VH1 Plans Entertainer Of Love!
Love him or hate him Frank “The Entertainer” is definately a character. The man lives with his parents, is very competitive, and will even suck on your toes if you ask nice! Ever since his stints on I Love NY 2 and the I Love Money series on VH1, fans have been clammering to get Frank his own show and it looks like the gods have finally granted our wish!
To read more please click “continue reading” below!
Continue Reading 1 comment June 27, 2009
BREAKING NEWS: Bravo is infultrated by Big Brother.
As I was sitting down to watch a little television last night, my clicker stopped on Bravo to watch a little NYC Prep (don’t judge). As I was fast forwarding through the commercials (thank god for Tivo) I saw a famliar face pop onto the screen and immediatly had to see what was going on. Bravo’s new show Miami Social has a former Big Brother houseguest! Where is Julie Chen when you need her?!
To read more please click “continue reading” below!
Continue Reading 1 comment June 26, 2009
What exactly is a “Were-bag”?
Apparently, “Brooklyn” aka Chris from Vh1’s Daisy of Love can’t get enough of the reality dating show spotlight, as he also appears in MTV’s new show Is She Really Going Out With Him?.
To read more please click “continue reading” below
Continue Reading Add comment June 22, 2009
A Big Thank You
To All Our Loyal Fans,
WordPress (who hosts our site) recently put up a top 100 list of blogs that are gaining popularity. Now, I wouldn’t be telling you this if we weren’t somehow involved right? I’m Not Here To Make Friends was ranked 57th in growing blogs on wordpress!
Thanks so much for coming and wasting some of your day here with us and our ramblings. In just a year, our little show that could has grown to have some really great fans. Thank you again.
Check out our listing as well as 99 other here
Add comment June 22, 2009
Daisy of Love : This is the Dawning of a New Era
First off, this is the BEST EPISODE EVER of Daisy of Love. It took me a whole week to distill the awesomeness of this 44 minutes of television down into the written word, that or I’ve been drinking too much again. Let’s say both! It’s as if there was a contract between Daisy and I for her to give me a great episode to write about. So, let’s start this episode out right Daisy, do we have a deal? Look, it’s hot tub time! Also, you’re asking if everyone is single. Awesome! Thanks Daisy. Fox decides to up the ante in this impress-the-viewer-with-the-best-episode-opener-ever-ness by acting super shifty about answering the question. Sinister tries to get in on the action by getting upset and leaving. Sinister, you fail. Sorry, the overly hurt puppy dog routine goes to your roommate/best friend. I know Sinister, you’re the sensitive musician, but really, Chi Chi just has the skinny build and big cartoon eyes for it.
Now, how are they going to beat the hot tub scene to keep the viewers tuned in, instead of clicking around to find out what else is on? It’s as easy as simple math, Daisy + French Maid Outfit + An Idea To Make Breakfast – The Cooking Sense That I Had In Grade Three = Asses In Seats, and let’s face it, that’s what VH1 is really after. Will Daisy find love? Who cares about a lasting relationship as long as she’s trying to make pancakes that are 1/4th batter, 1/2 chocolate chips and 1/4th herpes pure carbon. Don’t try this at home kids, let Daisy’s lesson of “it is really fucking hard to cook pancakes” warn you off of such burdensome tasks.
Needless to say, reactions are mixed at the ole breakfast table. Chi Chi remarks on the chocolate overload rather than the carcinogen overload while Sinister has a tummy ache. I Sinister, I hunger edible food! 12 Pack and Flex are on the same page as Sinister and just douse the food in whipped topping to make it nearly palatable. Big Rig, ever the glutton for punishment, is impressed and enjoys the food. I feel sorry for anyone who’s ever taken the time to cook this man a good meal. To make Big Rig a tasty meal it seems you just have to show up in some sort of slutty outfit.
Continue Reading Add comment June 21, 2009
“It’s a good thing I didn’t eat an ice cream sandwich or I’d crap my pants.”
In our most recent podcast we talked about Linda Vista Hospital and its recent use in Charm School 3. Allison totally debunked this “scary place” as a total hollywood filming grounds. The facts are here in the following links.
Need a hospital for your film?
Using abandoned hospitals is somewhat common place in hollywood as most real hospitals don’t need the interruption of a film crew in their lives. Scrubs is a well known show that utilizes an out of service hospital in Valley Village, CA.
Allison’s mother is a huge fan of the supernatural so don’t let her know that half of all of this is utter poppycock.
Do you have no idea what this is in reference to? Listen to our most recent podcast.
Add comment June 16, 2009
Take A Short Survey Please
I have been putting off participating in this survey but, if all you wonderful listeners could please take a moment to answer this quick survey it would really help us out.
This all goes towards getting advertisers so Bryan and Allison can continue to bring you the same hilarious podcast every week.
Your time is really appreciated!
Add comment June 14, 2009
Daisy of Love : Get Over Here!
You know what’s an awesome thing to do the day after you’ve been burned? Cage Fight! Or so Flex informs us at the top of this episode of Daisy of Love. That’s right, Daisy, the girl who never lets us forget that she’s the niece of a famous boxer or lets us forget that she hates violence is going to make the boys beat on each other for her enjoyment. Presumably Riki talked her into it, and why wouldn’t he? He loves playing theses boys for a fool, even more so on national television. Some of these boys (Big Rig & Chi Chi) are more excited for this than others (Flex & Sinister). Big Rig is just happy that he’ll get to beat on someone and has stayed on the show longer than his stint on “Ultimate Fighter 7.”
Chi Chi vs. Fox. Round one. FIGHT! Or rather go the Fox method and after landing a few good hits and holding your own, tap out like a complete wuss at the first chance you can get so that Chi Chi won’t mess up your hair. I’ve never seen anything more anti-climatic in my life. Ok, I have, but we’ve all woken up to a snowless Christmas morning so that should go without saying, but I will, just to fill space, because it’s far more interesting that what’s going on on Daisy of Love right now. Fighting, gah. Lame, and it gets lamer seeing nonprofessionals go at it. It’s like some redneck backyard league of mediocrity. Who am I to say that these fights shouldn’t go on? No one, I’ll sit here and watch them anyway, waiting for someone to get hurt or at least walk off the show. Can we get another walk off? Please? Without all the quitters this show might almost become a conventional dating reality show. Frankly, that’s not what I’ve been tuning into see.
Because I’m not in charge at VH1, or a major arbitrator of good taste in entertainment, the fights go on. Big Rig beats on 12 Pack for a bit, and hits him in the face pretty hard after his helmet flies off. If you can’t tell, Big Rig totally won this fight. The next is Flex and 6 Gauge, and they seem to be a pretty even match. So even that wardrobe crew dressed them in the same color shorts and I couldn’t even tell who was who or who was winning until they told me it was Flex. Finally we have the best friends/roommates Chi Chi and Sinister go at it. It is almost comical how Chi Chi, a trained fighter, is treating Sinister, a sensitive musician who doesn’t need to fight, man. It’s so lame that even Riki is all “what the damn is going on.” While Chi Chi isn’t giving it all he can Sinister lands a heck of a hook on Chi Chi’s chin. After that, Chi Chi basically takes Sinister down, hard, like he should’ve 10 minutes ago.
Continue Reading Add comment June 14, 2009
I am far to rich and famous to be here….
So I must admit, I am starting to watch I’m A Celebrity: Get Me Out Of Here! on Hulu. I wouldn’t dare spend 2 hours of my life for 4 days a week watching this but I wanted to know if anyone else is watching it. I am not enjoying it. I think it is poorly put together and poorly done and well Spencer and Heidi can suck it.
It’s one thing to think you are better then other celebs but Spencer says it! It just makes him look more like a tool. I wonder if anyone told him that The Hills isn’t real and that no one REALLY respects him at all. What a tool! What a douchebag! America WHY did you let these two idiots become celebs? Of course, by talking about them I am just adding to their celebrity aren’t I? It’s a double edged sword.
Yes this show has made me so angry that I am blogging about it but there is a certain line that reality television shouldn’t cross. Reality television is already the red headed stepchild of ACTUAL television so it is hard to see if dig its hole even deeper with this crap. What was NBC thinking putting this show on 4 nights a week! The only thing worse then having to sit through Spencer are possibly the hosts who can’t seem to read a telepromter/cue cards because its the most lack luster performance I have seen. I could care less if this show is live….since this is America’s choice, can i kick off the hosts? Go back to MTV Damien…you actually did well there.
But hold on…there is ONE glimmer of hope and its Frangela. I love them on VH1 and I love them here. Keep doing what you do girls and I MAY just keep watching on Hulu. Thank you Jesus.
Add comment June 13, 2009
The Return of Evel Dick!
You know him….you love him….and now he’s back! Check out how Evel Dick is involved in Big Brother 11!
I [Evel Dick] will also be doing a weekly webcast with Janelle to fill the void left by the Cancellation of Housecalls.
It will be a call in show that will talk about the feeds and anything and everything else going on in the house and being talked about on the internet.
I will be in studio while Janelle will be in NYC, but will be as good as sitting next to me co-hosting the show (well, as good as for you people, but I am getting jipped.)
We will also be doing a “He said, She said” type blog or column.
What are your thoughts? Are you as excited as we are?
Add comment June 12, 2009
Solitary 4.0 Casting
Do you think you have what it takes to survive VAL? Well season 4.0 is nearly upon us and if you think you have the nerve to go solitary why not audition.
Tell them I’m Not Here To Make Friends sent you…..who knows it may help (though I highly doubt it!)
All the information you need is in the link below (plus some helpful hints from the casting directors and #4 himself Rob Rob). The last day for auditions is June 24 so hurry up!
2 comments June 12, 2009
